Monthly Archives: May 2011

It’s gettin’ hot in herrrre

Sup? It is so hot here, I’ve got to tell ya, I wish I had me a fan!!

Yesterday I went to Whole Foods for samples with Tessa and stopped by Marshals! What a nice break from campus. As I’ve mentioned, I’m looking for a bathing suit for my summer camp counselor position this summer, and so I looked around at Marhsals and found this gem!

I'm sorry, but what IS this thing?

Yes my friends, I think we have a winner.
just kidding, I’d be fired on a hot second wearing that baby.


I found these awesome giant raisins. Have you ever seen raisins so big? Who is a raisin lover out there? I used to love love them but now I prefer dried cranberries because they are tart. Raisins have become too sweet.

Tessa and I perused the samples but they really had nothing but a milk sample and some chocolate mousse. We stopped by the bakery section and checked out the object of our affection (and worst fear)….the CINNAMON BUN

It was a rather short outing because Tessa, as an RA, had to be back on campus to move more people out. It was really great to hang out with her though and I’m definitely going to miss her when I go abroad next year!

I took a detour to Deals and Steals on my way back to Smith because I wanted to stock up for home on the cheap stuff.

the loot!

For under $20? I think yes!

10 packaets of organic instant oatmeal
20 packets of tea
1 cinnamon sugar kettle corn
1 mint chocolate soy crisps
1 baked salt and pepper chips
1 soy nut butter
1 banana peanut butter (for when I *possibly* can eat nuts!)
4 packets of  vegan stabilizer for whipped cream (or oats, methinks!)
3 packages of tea; blueberry green x1 and iced green x2
1 steaz orange soda thing (stevia rocks my world!)
1 chocolate cake mix- sweeten your own. I’m going to use my nunaturals baking blend that I won in Whitney’s giveaway!
1 tofu pudding mix
4 vegan green shake protein poweders
3 bars to add to my mouldy bar stash, a la Freya 
Yes. I’m way excited!!

It was just so hot yesterday too. Today is a bit better, although I’m warm because I just got back from a long walk with mah book.
I lay around lazily yesterday taking photobooth pics of myself to document the heat.


Our a cappella group had our senior banquet, as I mentioned. It was okay and singing the song went alright, I just didn’t look at A as I sang it.

we made them shirts!

Speaking of clothing I’d like to talk about pants.

Today my mom sent me my black pants to wear for Glee Club and Groove when we perform today and tomorrow. I have one pair of black pants I always wear, knowing that they fit me and I feel good wearing them. Another thing you should know about me is that I always wear one outfit per day, avoiding changing for body image reasons. Well, upon receiving these pants in the mail, I went to the campus center bathroom to put them on and found them a bit tight. I was actually surprised at how well I handled this.
As I may have mentioned (or perhaps I forgot), while at home between senior week and the end of school, I tried on everything in my closet. I liked the way all my clothes felt and I felt good when I looked in the mirror. I thought my legs looked strong and would be a part of my body I would be comfortable to show around in shorts at camp this summer, rather than hide for being too thin, like I usually do.

The thing is, I just battle with myself lately about whether I’m okay with gaining necessary weight. In the past few months, my hair has gone from feeling like limp straw to renewed bouncy curls and my nose is less pointy. The backs of my hands no longer sink in between my tendons and I am okay to sit in a hard chair for more than 30 minutes. Does this freak me out? Yes! Especially because I haven’t been doing as well at eating normally as I could be, but I also see that my rules around food are going away and I could very well be eating more than I think I am.

It is so hard to be in this place, the place directly between recovery and sickness. I know I want recovery but it is hard sometimes to see into the future to what it would mean.  My body image goes up and down by the second- situational. One second I’m freaking out and the next I feel relatively fine.

I know for sure that the only thing to do now is to move forward. There are so many wonderful, beautiful people who have recovered from this and I can too. I just need to prove it to myself. Besides, you can’t live stuck inside an eating disorder. I’ve found that being with people is far less painful than it was before. I can be friendly and amiable, I don’t have to be moody and crabby. There is life that is waiting for me, possibly even this summer!!

Off to sing from 1230 to 6pm. lord almighty!

Love, Hannah



Hi y’all.

I’ve been slacking with my posting lately which is mainly because I’ve been strung between finals and home and being back at school to record for a cappella 6 hours a day. Needless to say, I’m exhausted and can’t even make straight thoughts.

Today’s recording session was awful. Our pitch yelled at me again and this time I broke. I apologized to her between hands I held to my face as if they could stop the tears. She didn’t even apologize or listen to me. She walked away.
I left the room and found another member of our group outside who sat me down and rubbed my back while I tried not to lose it completely.

I’ll give A (the pitch) the benefit of the doubt. I was having low energy (I have NO energy today and yesterday….) and because of that, I might have not had the most positive attitude. But I also hate feeling needy or drawing attention to myself, so I wouldn’t  tell anyone even if I was feeling seriously ill for fear they wouldn’t care or would think I was trying to get attention. During recording, I could barely keep my eyes open, but I said nothing. Not to mention that I kept falling asleep on my feet. I was just miles away.

As you know, the struggle between this pitch and I is not a one time thing, it has happened before. Perhaps it all stems back to my general lack of social abilities, I don’t know. But it is certainly making spending multiple hours with my a cappella group- a pastime I used to so enjoy- kind of dreadful.  I’ve been thinking a whole bunch about what it is that makes people drop me. I don’t have any answers yet, but I’m trying to be mindful of how I act around others so I can read their signals if I’m doing something wrong. Regardless, I don’t think she has any right to berate me every time she’s feeling down. She does it in private, maybe so people can’t stick up for me. Luckily, a. she is graduating on sunday and b. I still know that I’m a worthwhile person. You all follow my blog, so I must have some redeeming qualities. haha.

Do you have any advice? 

Our glee club had the senior banquet last night. I went, sat with K and C, ate 2 plates of salad, buttered broccoli and mashed potatoes (poor veg options!) and then we left. We just weren’t feeling it and it was C’s birthday so we walked around in town a bit before going to get her the free Sundae that you get on your birthday from  our local ice cream joint.
Town hosts two markets each week which is really fun. The saturday morning farmers market and a smaller scale tuesday market which is the one we encountered quite by accident while walking the back way so as not to walk around the restaurants huge glass windows and be discovered/shamed for our leaving the banquet. Wow that was a long sentence.


I love free samples, so we tried some different spreads. I think this one was like maple gooseberry? I liked it. I’m not sure K did though…

maybe not?

that face says I'm just smiling for the photo

C liked it!


and the best part was that there was a cute little black lamb for petting/nuzzling. I did the latter, of course.


but it walked away and wouldn't pose with me

We tried some cheese. I have got to say, anywhere where samples are, samples of cheese are my favorite. Whole Foods shout out??

although I wasn't so fond of these

something funny happened; I tried some goat cheese that I liked!! Strange, I usually find it too bitter. It contained honey, which I usually find too sweet, but this cheese was to die for, seriously! There may be hope to me visiting the land of goat cheese yet!

C for her birthday sundae.

very cute

and some chocolate all over her lips.


All in all, we agreed it was better than just sitting at senior banquet.

Time for retro pictures!

Sunday began with a run. I was feeling ambitious/not tired as usual, and woke up to some nut butter covered dates- of course!

best combo ever!

is there even a date under there?
It was sunday and E and I (being the earliest risers in the house) made breakfast in bed for my mother on Mother’s Day. Guess what I made?

Happy Mother's Day Mom!


all trayed up

My mom shares my love of oatmeal, which makes everything easy :)
we didn’t want to make Dad feel bad, so we whipped him up some rather ugly lookin’ pancakes from the leftover batter in the fridge. Sounds terrible, but I tried one and they weren’t bad.

a tad lumpy

Then I went on my run.


I love my mother photo bombing in the background.
Had myself a delish vanilla protein shake.

thick and creamy and cold

I was amazed at myself. I’ve been feeling really tired lately, but since I’ve been home I’ve been eating better (more carbs!) and I did my whole run without stopping which was pretty big for me and the fatigue I’ve been feeling. I knew I wanted a big refuel when I got home!

fooling around....

Yes, I looked terrible and put on some snazzy sunglasses ;)

I had another one later.


Do you ever get on two smoothie day kicks?

Now I’m going to go get some lunch and read a bit before our senior banquet tonight- a cappella style! I hope it turns out okay. I’m singing “Slow Pony Home” by The Weepies which is the senior song. I have the solo but I’m not sure how comfortable I feel singing it to A. I feel like maybe I’m not the one she’d choose….ugh feelings! slow pony home. Nice song, really.
See you tomorrow!! a review of some yummy things is coming, as well as a recap of senior banquet!

Love, Hannah


Hi you all. I don’t know what I’m doing getting into the habit of making nighttime posts, but I should hope that I don’t make it permanent. Do you prefer nighttime or morning posts?

I’m back to school tomorrow because my a cappella group is recording over what our school calls “senior week” – the week before commencement. Glee club also performs at the commencement concert the night before commencement, which is a nice little thing. One more week on campus. It has been nice being home for a couple days though. I’ve made 2.5 loaves of banana bread, had a great rice cake in a jar and some yummy salad beasts! I hope this week is fun, and it will probably involve lots of long walks, some runs and reading by the ton. What it won’t involve, is recipes and cooking. I’m sorry guys but there just is no opportunity for this while I’m there. Look for me to be fully back in action by sunday next though!

ALSO I should warn you that I’m working as a summer camp counselor this summer and won’t be cooking either. I’ll try to post as often as I can, but since I have to be “on” 100%, I don’t know what I can promise. I hope you’ll all stick around for fall though (and the future) because I’m going to LONDON and will have my very own flat with a kitchen and the cooking/grocery store exploration will begin! Again, I’m really sorry about this but I’m really looking forward to both being a counselor and studying abroad.

Please, please stay with me guys, I really value your comments.

alright, enough sappy sap.

breakfast time!

all the fixin's

I think spring is finally here.

strawbs in the sun

time for a yogurt mess!

love it

something about those slices

all together now

1 container Fage 2% (this stuff. so creamy.)
1 cup puffed wheat

simple and good. 

I basically unpacked today

and unpacked

and brought some stuff up to my room.

then I had some lunch.

salad beast!

2 slices pickle
1 wasa cracker
tuna fish

Anyone else like salad as much as I do?? 

and I decided to put the tuna with some veggie cheese on the wasa cracker.  

melty goodness

My family ordered chinese food for dinner so I ordered some plain veggies and stir fried them up with some yogurt curry sauce.

hot and steamy!

True confessions: I’m a girl who always professed to hate television. I find most shows pointless, crude and mindless. I’d prefer to spend my time reading or talking or taking long walks or something that uses my brain. BUT my parents recently started watching Glee and told me to watch it. Being a singer myself (a cappella and Glee club) I decided to give it a shot.
Let’s just say that I watched 4 episodes in a row on Netflix last night…..
While I can’t say this is a complete turn around for me and TV, I must admit, I really like Glee (this rhymes!)
This certainly doesn’t mean I’m going to watching Jersey Shore or other reality things or whatever, but I like what Glee has to offer. It deals with some real things in a mature way and has witty banter and I like that.
and maybe now I won’t have to look so blank when people talk about television.
I don’t meant to offend at all, I’m just being real. Everyone deserves a true confession sometimes.
love, Hannah

After long silence

So hey guys, remember me? I’m finally done for the year, which is such a relief, and I’ve got a couple days worth of photos for you!! I’m going to just do a bit of recap with photo captions and then tell in glorious detail the things that need telling, of course.

one pale green monster- check!

eating some SNB

desk before moving out

desk after moving out

I seriously notice a clothing-color trend...remember this shelf? empty!

home, sweet home!

I thought I wouldn't open this. WRONG.

Nothing wrong with having two  jars of nut butter open at once, right?

protein shake?so much green in the back yard!

I got a little mail...

just a little ;)

so I opened one- gosh, I am so glad I ordered some packing filler....

I came home to my long expected packages of things to review for you all!! I am so psyched to try everything and give you all my two cents. OH WAIT – seriously, here is the UPS guys RIGHT NOW.

sepia? package?About Time protein powder!! SO EXCITED!

and yes, I am fully aware of how pale I am. My mother told me to get some sun while we were at Target today. I’ll get some sun when it comes out from behind those ominous clouds…


Eden Foods was lovely enough to send me this package of Rye Noodles. Review later in a delicious recipe from my Happy Herbivore cookbook that I got from Jessica’s giveaway!

packing peanuts!

I also won a NuNaturals giveaway from Meg’s blog! So excited. It came wrapped in tons of these packing peanuts. BUT my mom tried and they’re the kind you can dissolve in water and are therefore environmentally friendly!! So excited to put them in a huge bucket and watch them disappear….

can't wait!

Newman’s Own Organics sent me a huge box full of goodies that I can’t wait to try but there are so many, I’m going to have to make a separate blog post for that sucker. Thanks NOO!!

see Emma? I told you we had some....

I dug out the jar of Marmite, after seeing Emma talk about it on twitter. I don’t know friend, I’m still not sure I’m convinced.
Have any of you ever had Marmite? How do you like to eat it? 

butternut squash with cinnamon, celery, mustard, green beans

a little lunching occurred yesterday.

Mom made this!

This cake was for my brother E’s Boy Scout cake derby. Looks beautiful but the mix had beef lard in it!! YUCK. We don’t usually (read: ever) use mixes, but this one wasn’t going to us anyhow. Besides which, it was a style contest. and yes, my mom made real buttercream frosting!

Under the Sea cake!

E poses with his cake entry

The cake derby was really fun, each cake we saw was creative and brightly colored anddddd something I’d probably never eat. But the kids sure loved them!

Would you like fries with that?

the cake train's a comin'

life's a beach!

G helped judge the cakes.

picking the prizes


E’s cake won 3’rd prize for most creative.

come on! give us a real smile

We won this cake.


G and E dug right in when we got home. I abstained. Tub frosting and I, we’re just not meant to be. 

more RCIAJ

This happened this morning, quick, as mom and I had to head to school for banking with the kids, then off to Target. I’ve missed that place, for serious.

At Target I saw the most amazing catch I could ever hope to make. He’s powerful and handsome….oh man oh man. Let me introduce you to my love.


This guy screams Hummus and Nut Butter. Our current food processor holds about 1 cup. Not doin’ it for me. I need a stronger man in my life.

Mom took me to 16 Handles for lunch!! I’ve been wanting to try this place- it’s self serve FroYo with 16 different flavors at once!!


Needless to say, I tried (almost) all 16.

so much funnnnn

before toppings. Yes, it's ugly, I know

I was a little nervous for this, I’ll tell you. If only because it was something new and it was a little overwhelming. But I tried a dot of everything, which was a bit crazy.

self serve toppings too

basically 1 piece of each kind of fruit and a sprinkle of granola

I think mom’s looks a bit more picture-worthy. 

But I liked it!! Next time though I won’t be getting so many flavors. It is hard to be mindful if you’ve forgotten which ones you’ve chosen.


I home and got cozy with the oven! G had been begging me to make cornbread and we had some Bananas that were a lovely chocolate brown that were on the way out. I made some Banana Cornbread. Mom said it’s the best thing I’ve ever made- I’m so proud.

the little one is for G

and yesterday while packing, I shut my finger in my packing trunk.

sad pinky :(

If you know me, you’ll know that blood/injury type things make me want to pass out/vomit. So this had a bandaid on it before I even looked at it. and I had to sit down.

So for dinner last night, I did A CHALLENGE!
Once upon a time, there was a girl named Hannah. She used to love spaghetti and meatballs (before she was veg) with her family. They made their own sauce with tomatoes from their garden and the whole wheat pasta was truly nourishing as she enjoyed it with her family.  Flash forward a couple of year and this girl won’t touch pasta and has a hard time with carbs. It doesn’t help that her college only serves refined, white pasta smothered in oily sauces. Flash forward a couple weeks. The girl receives a package in the mail….. 


The folks over at Eden foods sent me Rye pasta to try. I was actually a bit excited about this, hoping that the pasta would have a flavor that would cause me to like pasta again or to want to re-friend it. I decided on Broccoli Pesto from the Happy Herbivore Cookbook.

all ready- Martha Stewart-wise

I loved the sauce on this recipe. It was recommended that you use twirl pasta so the sauce stuck inbetween the curls. It definitely did here!!

So good!

Seriously? Where has tofu been all my life??? or rather, all my life lately.

I added more broccoli because I just like it. Steamy love affair, basically.

broccoli= love

close ups!

I’d give you guys a fork-shot here, but I licked it :)
and some SNB/SSB-celery-dried cranberry action for a mini dessert!

this is a winning combo

Ookay. I’ll be honest with you guys. I loved this. and it was frightening, because it has been SO LONG since I’ve eaten pasta. I loved the rye flavor, it was just unlike any pasta I’ve ever had and oh, so much better. It had a definite whole wheat/nutty flavor to it that I loved and the texture was somewhat more substantial than normal pasta. The lovely rye color really lent itself well to the green of the broccoli pesto, as well. Hands down guys, this pasta is a winner!!
Thank you so very much Eden Foods for providing me with this wonderful challenge and delicious pasta! Oh, and just in case you guys don’t think this was actually my own review; Eden didn’t tell me to talk about this. I was totally down for the challenge and my taste buds judged for themselves. 5/5 for sure.

Alright, I’m off for the night. Hope you guys enjoyed my LONG post.

What is a challenge food for you? Something you used to love as a kid that you haven’t had lately? Have you ever had Rye pasta? (go try it NOW!) What is your favorite thing to do with pasta? Were you a boy scout/girl scout?  

Love, Hannah

MIA One More Day! (giveaway winner!)

Hey guys,

sorry I’ve been MIA.

To be honest, I haven’t been doing anything exciting besides studying and food has been boring since I’m not home and cooking yet and I’m basically just cleaning out my fridge.
JUST WAIT until tomorrow or the next day though. Can’t wait!!
I have my exam  at 2 today which is naptime (not) usually soooo. It is my only one though, so at least it will be over with.
OH and who is the giveaway winner?


Who isssss….Lauren!!


I’ll be emailing you right now for your address girl!!
and when I’m home, be sure I’ll do some more day to day posts!!

Have a great May 3’rd?

Sunday Survey

Happy Sunday! It is the second day of reading period here on the college-front and we have t-minus 2 days until HOME TIME!

home means:
-more cooking
-more baking
-more time to blog and write comments on your wonderful bloggies!
-more time with the fam
-more reading!

Carrie did this survey a couple days ago and I wanted to wait until sunday so I could do a double letter title. Although I could have also done it yesterday? whatevs. I love surveys and filling out information, it’s supper fun! Hope you enjoy this lighter post after my more serious things lately.

I also want to do a Q&A post so ask me your questions


Clothing style: Seriously varies by the day. Sometimes I’m….



really casual!


Nail polish color: something light….and probably green?
Make up item: Mascara

Stores: H+M, Anthropologie, Gap, I’m also a really big fan of the free box? Can you say no to free name brand clothing?? I sure can’t

Sport: biking, running, crew
Clothing item: probably nice dresses and skirts.
Shape: shape? um….I pick my sweet potatoes based on shape….


Number: 6 and 24
Sports team: I don’t really have any preferences here….
Color: earthy colors and fall colors, for sure. I tend to own lots of greens, browns, oranges, and blues

see a trend?

Breakfast item: I’m a big fan of oats, and of course, I have to eat nut butter with EVERYTHING.

Type of music: anything really, I like to match my music to my mood :)

Song: Currently? Probably something by Deb Talan right now
Tv show: I actually don’t watch TV
TV channel: See above….
Magazine: Fitness, Health, Runners World, Vegetarian Times, Clean Eating, National Geographic, Psychology Today, Tricycle, Shambala Sun

Hair style: natural?
Hair length: short-er
Shoe type: strappy sandals or boots!

found these in Marks and Spencer

Animal: Owls or Rabbits or Hedgehogs!
Transportation: walking, of course :)
School subject: philosophy- I love thought!
Talk show: see the TV question
Fruit: pummello!


Vegetable: I like them all. Although I HAVE to have my salads


Vacation spot: Abroad. For sure.
Book: Jane Eyre and Wuthering Heights- give me the suspense and romance of the Bontes hands down
Eye color: hazel?

Hair color: light brown?
Hobby: blogging, singing, knitting (yes, I’m a grandma), cooking, running, walking, thinking, getting really existential and freaking myself out, reading, writing, travel, volunteering
Flower: Fuchsia

Sound: rain, thunderstorms, singing, music, spring peepers (is this just an east coast thing?)
Holiday: Christmas (for the cheerful spirit), my birthday/thanksgiving (they’re the same!), well I just like holidays- they make me feel happy!

beautiful tree

Scent: not smell? I like the smell of baking food, but I really like light scents, vanilla is good. My mom used to wear Chanel No.5 and would put it on a pillow for me to smell if she went out.
Culture food: anything without sesame (I’m allergic), not a fan of pasta….working on that?
Restaurant: anything really, I like buffets with huge salad bars!

Month: fall or spring (this is cheating)

Hope you guys enjoyed getting to know me a bit!

This morning I woke up to my RCIAJ (Rice Cakes in a Jar)


-2 brown rice cakes
-1/4 cup calcium fortified OJ (too lazy to go downstairs to nab soy milk from the dining room)
-1 nearly empty Hemp Seed Butter jar
-a few slices of banana
-SNB, for dipping, of course
-some craisins
-maybe a drizzle of yogurt?
Let sit overnight and you’ve got a delicious concoction in the morn’.

too bad the jar is so dark!

Yesterday I decided I couldn’t wait until I got home to open my new jar of Soy Nut Butter.  I thought I could, but my fridge was filled with these:

all empty! (except the new one!)

So yesterday it was this:


now it is this:

true love

only I didn't eat the entire jar...obvs

I’m off on a short run to see if I can handle it without my ace bandage- then it’s editing my two long papers and studying for Art History!!
Love, Hannah

ps: as evidenced by this post, operation: Eat a Good Breakfast on the Weekend is a WIN!
Happy May, today is the last day to enter my GIVEAWAY


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